and communicating about their children’s needs to help pave a way forward. A child-inclusive mediator will firstly see both separating parents whose permission is required for the mediator to meet with their children on their own. Once parents have consented, the mediator will make initial contact with the children to explain what the conversation would involve and ask them if they would like to do it. During one meeting with the mediator, the children can express their feelings about their parents break up. They are not asked to make choices or decisions about their personal situations and, although they can ask the mediator to relay what they have said to their parents, they are under no obligation to do so. It is really important that everybody involved enters into CIM with the right intention and are prepared for what might come out of it. The process usually involves children aged 10 or over. Younger children can be involved with their older siblings however it is understandably not appropriate for tiny children. What are the benefits of child-inclusive mediation? Divorce can have long-term effects on children’s mental and physical well-being. Child-inclusive mediation promotes a spirit of cooperation and communication between separating parents to work together in their children’s best interests. My experience of the benefits reflect extensive research findings which re-enforce how children benefit from talking with, and expressing their feelings to, an impartial mediator - even if they do not want anything they said passed back to their parents. Studies also confirm how children who have had their voices heard in this way tend to have better mental health outcomes as young adults compared to their peers who have experienced parental separation but have not gone through this process. WWW.LAWYER-MONTHLY.COM 43 About Nicki Applauded as an ‘exceptional’ family lawyer’ (Legal 500 2024 UK) and ‘very experienced and ADR focused’ (Chambers 2024 Guide). A Partner at Jones Myers, I am a Collaborative Family Lawyer, Family Law Mediator and Child Inclusive Mediator with extensive experience in family law. I specialise in the financial aspects of relationship breakdown, particularly complex cases involving family businesses, multiple properties, and complicated pension arrangements. I believe strongly in finding the right way for couples to work out the terms of their separation. My skill set offers clients wide-ranging options, including an innovative and integrated approach to mediation, which can bring together various processes and professionals to find a bespoke process. My practice includes collaboration with professionals on a regional, national and international level. Jones Myers is a multi-award winning niche family law firm whose reputation is recognised nationally and internationally. Retaining top rankings in legal guides for almost three decades, the firm’s specialist lawyers include an in-house counsel. Supporting separating couples to keep out of court using processes including mediation, child inclusive mediation and collaborative family law, the practice is also highly experienced and confident when litigation is necessary. www.jonesmyers.co.uk
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